Yes, this is a complicated space! Especially since there is a long history of masc presenting, gender-non-conforming, androgynous, and/or “he/him" pronoun using lesbians, all of whom continued to embrace their womanhood, even while expanding the limits of what it means to be a woman.

I think this is why self-identification is so important. Because ultimately, pronouns and appearance and body type and genital configuration and chromosomes aren’t the things that make someone a man, or a woman, or both, or neither: it’s what you feel yourself to be, or even just want you want to be or wish you could be. It’s Glinda the good witch saying “Dorothy, the gender was within you all along.”